Fire in My Eyes
by LarcSakurai
Summary: Akuroku. Roxas doesn't understand the visions he sees within the dancing flames, compelled to cry out to a man he'd never met. Takes place before Roxas realizes he's a nobody
1. Not Yet

A few quick swipes and the room was bathed in the soft dancing of firelight. Roxas lit the candle by his bedside, blowing out the match and discarding it to smolder in a nearby ashtray, watching the thin wisps of smoke curl and twist before disappearing into the darkness. A strange chill ran though him. As he watched the smoke slowly burn to naught he felt unreasonably scared. It was idiocy, what did he have to fear? It wasn't like he was going to disappear anytime soon, fade into eternal darkness. No, that was stupid. He couldn't just fade away like smoke. It was considered normalcy by him now to have these strange sensations float in and seize him only to disappate a few seconds later like nothing had ever happened.

Yet a stranger emotion gripped him still. A powerful, burning emotion. Oceanic eyes settled on the dancing flame absolutely captivated. Staring deep into the flaming glow he felt a strange heat spread through him, starting in his chest and working its way throughout his entire body until he was consumed by the flame of some distant, forgotten memory chained to his heart. The flame inside him slowly coaxed the boy onto his back, a soft noise escaping his throat at the sensation of lips against his throat though he were completely alone. There were hands along him too, he concluded. He could feel one tangled in his hair, the other snaking its way mischieviously lower, slipping below the waistband of his pants. Roxas tried to protest but the flame teased and stroked at him, elliciting a tiny moan. He didn't understand what was going on. A part of him didn't care. A part of him wanted more.

"A-Ax...Axel.." The strange name left his lips over and over, blindly compelled to call for a person he'd never met. He couldn't recall anyone with that name but it swelled up feelings of warmth and security inside him. For once he didn't feel alone. He always felt alone, even with Hayner and the gang. He knew there was something different about him and even though his friends were considerate enough to never openly admit it, he knew deep inside he wasn't equal. This name, this strange little name, erased his loneliness with one simple word. Axel. Just one word and the world ceased to exist.

Roxas sat up, feeling the heat within him shift as if a body was pulling away from him. He whined in protest, shivering against the sharp onset of chill night air. He wanted Axel, if that's what this heat wanted to call itself. He didn't want to be cold. He didn't want to be alone. He stared into the candlelight intently in hopes of conjuring up this delusional burning. Illusions of emerald eyes staring back at him beckoned from within the fire, playful and mischievious eyes belonging to a handsome face crowned with spikes of flaming red hair. Axel was calling for him.

"Axel..." Reaching out a shaking hand he allowed the flames to lick at his fingers, pulling away when he felt no pain. He was going crazy... He just stuck his hand in fire yet he was unscathed, no burns, no marks, no nothing. It was as if the flames didn't want to hurt him. He grabbed the flame, yelping as it was extinguished, leaving behind an angry mark in the center of his hand. Roxas brought the hand to his lips, gently kissing it. He understood completely. A message within the flames only he could decode. It wasn't time yet.

Not yet, Roxas.


	2. Tonight

After the events that had transpired the previous evening, Roxas couldn't find it within himself to focus. The burning image of those emerald orbs staring back at him from the depths of the flame taunted him relentlessly. That was Axel, of this he had little doubt though he had never seen the man before. He slowly closed his eyes, trying to conjure up the feelings that had overwhelmed him, the heat that rippled through him and brought the strange sensations that made his body shake and tremble with foreign desire. To no avail he tried over and over again, whispering soft the name that haunted his daydreams. There was nothing he could do to bring them back and Roxas briefly entertained the thought perhaps he was going insane after all.

"Hey Roxas! Why the long face?" Olette bounced into the usual spot, poking at the blonde's mouth with an ice cream. Roxas accepted the frozen treat, slowly dragging his tongue along his lips to taste the salty sweet confection. It was warm, he realized and it made him shudder. His tongue was brushing another's mouth, someone possessing amazing skills teasing him back. Roxas shuddered, yanked back into reality as he tasted the bitter chill of the ice cream. Olette's huge owl eyes stared at him in confusion, giggling as some sort of realization dawned on her.

"Ohhh, Roxas you're such a bad boy!" Roxas flushed a deep shade of red.

"W-What are you talking about?"

"Why else would you be making that face? You looked like you were really enjoying yourself." she teased, poking the other's nose. "Who were ya thinking about?"

"No one!" Roxas pushed her hand away and nibbled at the ice cream, refusing to look up and face the other.

"Okay, whatever you say Roxas." Olette plopped down next to him, the two friends dining on the summertime delicacy. Roxas frowned, licking off the sticky residue as it melted all over his hand.

"So where are the others?" Olette shrugged.

"Hayner's practicing for the tournament and Pence is still sleeping, the lazy bum."

Roxas chuckled. "Sounds about right. I should be practicing too."

"Roxas?" Olette looked over at him, reaching out to touch his knee. Roxas's face burned a deeper shade of red, swallowing a dry lump in his throat.

"Y-Yeah?"

"What's going on with you?" Roxas blinked, certainly not what he had expected.

"What are you talking about?" Olette stood up and stared down at him.

"You've been so quiet lately and you just stare out into space all the time. Did something happen? What's wrong?" Roxas's gaze dropped to the floor. He expected his friend's concern to eventually catch up with him. He'd tried to mask his confusion from the others but they were around each other so much it was pretty simple to detect a problem. His mind scrambled for a logical way to explain everything that had been going on lately. The feelings of loneliness and distance, the irrational fear, the dreams of some exotic and wild man he'd never met before.

"It's nothing." Roxas finally replied, settling for confronting his problems on his own. He knew there was nothing his friends could do to help him. This was something he had to solve on his own.

"Roxas.." Olette reluctantly nodded. If Roxas wouldn't talk then it was useless to pester him. He would talk to them when he was ready to.

"It's just something I have to do on my own." Olette bit her lip, wrapping her arms around Roxas in a tight hugg.

"Okay.. but you better come to us if you get in over your head. That's what friends are for." she stood up and ruffled his hair. "Good luck at the tournament. I think I'm gonna go shopping. See you later, Roxas!" With a wave she disappeared, leaving Roxas alone once more. The blond heaved a heavy sigh and left the usual spot to disappear into the warm glow of the sun. Slowly he strolled along, his mind once again drifting off into a daydream of that mysterious heat and the beautiful emerald eyes.

A soft thump behind him caught his attention and he whirled around, greeted by the sight of a book of matches laying on the ground. Kneeling down he picked it up, slowly striking one and watching the flame dance on the end of the stick. Staring into the heart of the flame he could once again see those eyes, more vibrant than before. He noticed within the depths of the emerald thin dark rings and it only made him all the more curious. What sort of eyes would have rings in them? He hissed as the match traveled down the stick and burned his fingers, the boy quickly striking another.

"Axel! Axel please..." He begged the little fire. "When can I see you? I don't understand. Why do you keep coming to me? Who are you?" The figure within the flame moved like a projection and Roxas could see all of him finally, though any detail was shrouded beneath the folds of a heavy black coat. He looked back over his shoulder at Roxas then up and the other followed his lead, gazing upon the dying light of the sun giving way to the velvet glow of moonshine.

Roxas hissed again as the flame died and but striking another rendered nothing within the flickering light. Axel had given him his next message and he would have to settle with it for now. He shook out the fire and pocketed what remained of the matchbook, heading for home. The flames had spoken once more and the message left him battling with himself, unsure of whether to be excited or utterly terrified.

Tonight, Roxas.


End file.
